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LinkedIn vs Reality

Yes, people definitely exaggerate on resumes. This isn’t 100% in every instance—there are of course those who are so self-effacing they might be bumped by a rude bar patron and then apologize to that patron—but it’s super, super common.

You have roughly 1,043 special “skills” on your LinkedIn profile. YOU ARE SUCCESSFUL IN EVERYTHING.

LinkedIn vs Reality
LinkedIn vs Reality

You are a whiz at a variety of things in the eyes of the general public. Yes, InDesign can be used to create graphics. With the best of them, you can choose a trendy font. Can you code a website on the side? Yes, you certainly can. You have nothing on Mark Zuckerberg. In any case, you’re far too serious to wear a hoodie in a professional setting. You have 23 endorsements, so let it be known that you know a lot about a lot of things. You’re a rockstar, and you’re just waiting for a job to come your way.

You Ask Yourself, “What Is Reality?” “Is That Something I’ve Done Before? Even a single time?” “Yup, I’ll add it,” they say.

What is HTML? “Hmmm. Let’s go with yes for now. “Have you heard of Photoshop?” ” Do you want to be in charge?” Well, that’s a little hazy, so DUH. “Powerpoint? “All right. That is something I am capable of. Guys, don’t get me started on Word Art. I am an expert. ” What is Microsoft Office? “YES, YES, YES, YES, YES “Excel?” “People don’t use Excel in the first place, do they?” “Email?” “CERTAINLY YES,” says the narrator. “Then there’s social networking, which is my personal favorite. “CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, Oh, my goodness, I’m going to need a job after this.”

You have “Limited Working Proficiency” in a foreign language, according to your LinkedIn profile.

For crying out loud, you took AP Spanish and are now practically a native speaker. Forget about the fact that you haven’t spoken the language in four years. No one cares as much about actual ability as they do about how it appears on a resume. Above all else, well-roundedness.

Reality: You Once Ordered A Beer And Some Chips In Spanish On Vacation Once

We all know the truth. Spring Break 2009 and the Facebook photo album entitled “la playa and cervezassssssss <3” is not a legitimate excuse for saying you can speak another language. Although, yes, knowing how to order alcohol in any other language can be, in fact, extremely helpful.

LinkedIn Profile: LinkedIn Asks “Do You Have Any Special Certifications?”

Reality: “WTF, I Need That Too?”

You’ve already convinced yourself that you can converse in Spanish, that the two intramural racquetball games you played were extracurricular activities, and that most of what you do in life is really just you “striving” and “aiming” to become a more successful human being. And now they’re requesting certifications from you? You’re thinking about lying. But, once again, you’re mainly bitter. LinkedIn, thank you. For nothing, I thank you.

More storys

From my experience, extroverts tend to overexaggerate, the introverts tend to be overly modest.

I know some freakishly high-performing software developers, who don’t even have a LinkedIn page, and if they do, it doesn’t have much to show for. They are of tremendous value to the company they work for, but almost nobody knows their names.

On the other hand, I have witnessed very polished consultants, all tanned, snow-white teeth, driving porches, all suited up, wearing designer scarfs on hot and sunny days, that were worthy diddly squat on a professional level.

Yes, they looked, sounded, and smelled like a million bucks, but behind all that charade, the shiny bells and whistles, they didn’t have much to show for it. They were all but “fried air”.

Do people like to overstate their achievements in resumes? Some do, and some absolutely don’t.


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